ERBzine 8060: Drabbles April 1-15 2025

What Have They Done To My Song, Ma

April 1: On this day in 2012, the film “John Carter,” opened in Japan. The Disney production was underpromoted world-wide and deemed a failure. The unfortunate retitling from “A Princess of Mars” to “John Carter” may have been a contributing factor. The decision to open the film in Japan on April Fool’s Day sort of speaks for itself.

Details about the film: https://erbzine.com/cartermovie.com/

The production values were outstanding, the casting superb, and the script while modifying from the original novel was pretty darn good. The CGI characters were faithful to ERB’s vision.

The film ran over budget, $306,000 but worldwide box office, DVD, and Blu Ray grossed 324,000 dollars. I can’t find an estimate for the return on the books and toys tied into the movie. Additionally, the film has appeared on Disney Plus and other streaming venues, so the final gross revenue numbers have never been revealed.

Disney acquired both AVENGERS and STAR WARS at roughly the time when they should have been paying attention to JOHN CARTER. For some reason they seem to have thought that the franchises all targeted the same demographic (males 10-15) and they seemed to believe that supporting all three would take viewers from their others, so John Carter suffered. The book noted that none of the advertisements or posters featured Dejah Thoris, and no attempt was made to mention the romantic angle. This goes back to their target demographic, which apparently didn't include girls of any age. Strange.

The drabble for today, “What Have They Done To My Song, Ma,”, is is excerpted from the article, “John Carter Changed Hollywood, but Not in the Way Disney Hop ed” by Richard Newby

https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/movies/movie-features/john-carter-bombed-1235109193/

What Have They Done To My Song, Ma
It’s a cruel twist of fate that John Carter got going mere months before Avatar’s release shattered box office expectations.

Now, years removed from John Carter, I can’t help but look at the landscape of 2022, a year that boasts the miniseries Obi-Wan Kenobi and the film Avatar 2, both owned by Disney. I find myself thinking about the anticipation built on the sands of Barsoom and the bones of John Carter, and wondering if we lost something or simply surrendered to the passage of time, something that not even a 110-year-old story can withstand in the realm of Hollywood.

GOLD IS WHERE YOU FIND IT

April 2: On this day in 1932, the film, “Tarzan the Ape Man” starring Johnny Weissmuller and Maureen O’Sullivan was released. Also, Argosy Weekly published the fourth installment of “Tarzan and the City of Gold.” Not bad for just one day.

Details about the film may be reviewed at: https://www.erbzine.com/mag6/0611.html

Photos, an ebook, and publishing details for “Tarzan and the City of Gold” - https://www.erbzine.com/mag7/0725.html

The drabble for today, “Gold is Where You Find It,” was inspired by the events on this day in 1932.

GOLD IS WHERE YOU FIND IT

Johnny Weissmuller bought a copy of the new ‘Argosy Weekly” on his way to the premiere of “Tarzan the Ape Man.”

Maureen O’Sullivan said, “Why did you buy that magazine?”

“It has an installment of “Tarzan and the City of Gold,” that’s the newest Tarzan story. Tarzan is always looking for jewels and gold.”

Maureen looked at the cover. “Why would Tarzan need gold?”

Weissmuller said, “I suppose that he isn’t being paid any better than you and me.”

“I see. Does he find a city of gold?”

“He does.”

“I’ll want to read it as soon as you’re finished.”

WE'LL ALWAYS HAVE PARROTS

April 3: On this day in 1920, “All-Story Weekly” published the third installment of “Tarzan and the Valley of Luna.” “Tarzan and the Valley of Luna” was published by All-Story in five installments. The story became the second half of the novel, “Tarzan the Untamed,” published by A. C. McClurg on April 30, 1920 – thirteen days after the final installment in All-Story Weekly.

<> Only the first installment, March 20, 1920, featured the story on the cover illustrated by P. J. Monahan. The cover for this issue was by Modest Stein, who illustrated some ERB pulp magazine covers, but this one was for “The Shadowers Inc Novel # 1: The Man Who Convicted Himself” by David Fox, a pseudonym of Isabel Ostrander. There were four “Shadowers” novels.The issue included the final episode of “The House With the Bad Name” by Perley Poore Sheehan, a writer who authored the occasional Burroughs pastiche.

Details about “Tarzan the Untamed” and “Tarzan and the Valley of Luna,” along with illustrations and a complete electronic version of the novel are located at: https://www.erbzine.com/mag4/0493.html

The lost city of Xuja is located in the Valley of Luna, peopled by a tribe who how use lions as cattle dogs and guardians. They worship parrots and monkeys, apparently all the other animal totem deities were already taken.

The drabble for today is “We’ll Always Have Parrots.” My thanks and apologies to Donna Andrews, who authored a hilarious book of that title. It’s about a science fiction convention invaded by monkeys and parrots. I wonder if she’d read “Tarzan the Untamed.”

WE'LL ALWAYS HAVE PARROTS
Bertha Kircher and Percy Smith-Oldwick were captured by the Xujans. Tarzan avoided the lions guarding the city gates and entered the city to rescue them.

Hundreds of monkeys followed him and flights of multi-colored parrots screeched overhead. The monkeys pelted Tarzan with dung and the parrots rained droppings down on him.

He found the couple. ‘I’m here to save you. Let me wash my hair first.”

“No don’t. These people worship monkeys and parrots as their gods. Their waste is a blessing that brings good luck. Wear poo proudly.”

Tarzan wiped his face. “Then today, I’m the luckiest man alive.”

THEOLOGICAL DIFFERENCES

April 4: On this day in 1914, All-Story Magazine published the first installment of “At The Earth’s Core” by Edgar rice Burroughs. The novel was serialized over four issues. The cover of the first issue was of a modestly dressed woman by Modest Stein. Each of the four installments had an interior headpiece by an unidentified artist. The novel was also serialized in “Modern Mechanics and Inventions” in 1929 with a new title, “Lost Inside the Earth.”

With this publication, Pellucidar joined Tarzan and Barsoom as Burroughs' creations for which he would write novels for many years. Tarzan eventually visited Pellucidar, but that’s a story for another time. A. C, McClurg published the first edition on July 22, 1922 with a cover and interior plates by J. Allen St. John.

A more complete publishing history and a planet full of artwork are available at: https://www.erbzine.com/mag7/0741.html

The drabble for today, “Theological Differences,” was inspired by the novel and by the beliefs of various religions, past and present.

THEOLOGICAL DIFFERENCES
David Innes returned to the Earth’s surface after many adventures in Pellucidar, an entire world within the planet, a world filled with strange plants, ancient animal life, and primitive humans.

He encountered a missionary and told him of his adventures at the Earth’s Core, a place named Pellucidar.

The missionary said, “You are mistaken. The Bible tells us that the underworld is filled with fire and brimstone. The Greeks and Roman knew that the devil lived underground. The called him Pluto and Hades.

David thought about Dian the Beautiful and replied. “I’m not wrong. It’s not hell. Pellucidar is heaven.”

YOU GET WHAT YOU WANT

April 5: On this day in 1905, Edgar Rice Burroughs made brief excursion into politics was elected an alderman in Parma, Idaho. The city had a population of bout three hundred people at the time. Now its population is a little more than two thousand people. Parma is the fourth largest city in Canyon County, Idaho.

The fictional drabble for today, “You Get What You Get, was inspired by Ed’s time as a city alderman.

YOU GET WHAT YOU WANT

Bill Kramer, a local businessman, stopped Alderman Edgar Rice Burroughs in the street.

“Ed, you know that I voted for you, but it seems to me that you don’t know much about being an alderman.”

“I don’t, Bill. I’m learning more about it every day.”

“Yeah, what have you learned?”

“I’ve learned that no matter what I do, almost half the people won’t agree and I’ve learned that people who stop me in the street

usually want something I can’t give them.”

“Damn Ed, I deserve better than that.”

“No, you don’t. Sad, but true. People deserve the government they elect.”

WHO'S IN CHARGE

April 6: On this day in 1893, Edgar Rice Burroughs and his horse, Captain,” took second place at the “Columbian Saddle Horse Show” in Detroit, Michigan. Ed rode with the Orchard Lake Cadets. The show was sponsored by the Detroit Riding Club.

A very brief article about the show is available at: https://detroithistorical.pastperfectonline.com/archive/53E13F1B-7AE3-41C6-B212-693188771006

Ed’s performance is mentioned at: https://www.erbzine.com/mag1/0130.html

During Burroughs’ life, Ed was a maser horseman, consummate driver who toured much of American and a licensed aircraft pilot. As far as we can determine, he never piloted a Navy ship, but he spent a lot of time onboard Navy vessels when he was a war correspondent during WW2, so it could be possible.

The fictional drabble for today, “Who’s in Charge,” was inspired by Ed’s prowess as a horseman and his experiences as an automobile driver. He was involved in a car accident or two. Over the years, numerous relatives and Tarzan actresses and actors, including Frances Gifford and Herbert Mundin, were injured or killed in automobile accidents.

WHO'S IN CHARGE

Emma Burroughs put her hands on her hips. “Ed, you’ve had another wreck. What were you thinking?”

“I was thinking about sending Tarzan to Pellucidar and suddenly the car just hit a lightpole. I didn’t tell the car to hit anything, but I didn’t tell it not to. Sometimes I wish I was still riding my horse, Captain.”

“Why would you still want to be on horseback?”

“If I told Captain to do something stupid, the horse would think for itself and ignore me. A car, however, will just run into any damn fool thing without giving it a thought.”

TYPE CAST

April 7: On this day in 1916, actor Anthony Caruso, who appeared as Mongo in Tarzan and the Leopard Woman, Sengo in Tarzan and the Slave Girl, and Grundy in the episode, The Figurehead, of the Ron Ely Tarzan television series, was born in Frankfort, Indiana. Caruso appeared in more than one hundred films, usually as a villain. His three appearances with the Lord of the Jungle were no exceptions.

Both films and the Ron Ely Tarzan series are featured at www.erbzine.com. Here’s the link to Tarzan and the Slave Girl: https://www.erbzine.com/mag19/1950.html

Caruso had one of those memorable faces and you knew that he was a bad guy the second he appeared on the silver screen. He also made frequent television appearances including Gunsmoke, Star Trek, Perry Mason, Have Gun Will Travel, Mission Impossible, Hawaii Five-O, and Bonanza.

The fictional drabble, “Type Cast,” was inspired by Caruso career.

TYPE CAST

Ron Ely said, “Welcome, Tony. We like to cast folks who were in Tarzan films. You made two didn’t you.”

“I did. I assume I’m playing a bad guy like in my Tarzan films.”

“You are. Every movie goer in America knows your face. The second you appear on screen, they know you’re a villain. It saves a lot of explanation.”

“I do have one request, Ron. Please don’t make me wear a stupid hat like I did in Tarzan and the Slave Girl.”

“No problem. I’d never be able to look at you without laughing my loincloth off.”

NEVER TOO ROUGH FOR TENNIS

April 8: On this day in 1935, Edgar Rice Burroughs continued a letter to his children on SS Lurline letterhead. The letter covered April 7th through the 10th He was honeymooning with his second wife, nee Florence Gilbert. He noted the seas were rough and while not seasick, the couple skipped dinner. The entry for the 8th was the most extensive.

The entire letter and several more may be read at Sunday April 7 in: https://www.erbzine.com/mag10/1049.html

The drabble for today, “Never Too Rough for Tennis,” is excerpted from the April 8, 1935 entry in that letter.

NEVER TOO ROUGH FOR TENNIS
Pretty rough yesterday. We did not go down to dinner although neither of us was actually sick. We played safe, for it is a long way from E deck, where the dining room is, to A deck and our cabin.

Went down to breakfast and met Captain Berndstrom for the first time. He is very pleasant.

We played deck tennis twice today. Like tennis except the court is smaller, the racket's solid like ping pong rackets, and the balls heavier than tennis balls.

We play with Carl Cooper and Carter Galt, a descendent of one of the original Missionary families.

BETTER TO FIGHT THAN FLEE

April 9: On this day in 1972, Russ Manning Tarzan Sunday story arc, “Korak and the City of Xuja,“ began. The story arc ran for twenty-four Sundays and ended on September 17, 1972.

The entire story arc and all of Manning’s Sunday pages and daily pages are available to read at www.erbzine.com/manning/ This story begins at: https://www.erbzine.com/mag17/1790.html

During his run as the writer and artist for the Tarzan Sunday and daily pages, Manning told stories about Tarzan and others about Tarzan’s son, Korak, known as Korak the Killer, although Manning’s version of Korak was a gentler one. Manning’s Korak is a young man who is considerably smaller than Tarzan. The art is amazing so is the story.

In the story, Korak led a group of ‘flower children,’ who are searching for a place to “live with nature.” The female group leader is named, Dina, transpose two letters and you have Dian, as in Dian the Beautiful. He guided them through the Mountains of the Moon. They are attacked by trained lions which take the daughter of the commune leader. The tribe that controlled the lions, worshiped parrots, specially an gigantic parrot idol, which gave them orders. Think Tur is Tur. The idol is occupied by a group of dwarves, more than seven, who speak for the parrot god in order to control the normal sized people of Xuja, a city of madman that was first featured in “Tarzan the Untamed. In the novel, the Xujians worshipped parrots and monkeys, but the monkeys are missing from this Sunday story arc. The little men posing as gods demand that female sacrifices be made to the idol so that they can have a regular supply of women. Korak exposes the plot.

<><> I was tempted to use an old joke by comedian Dave Gardner for the drabble, I didn’t, but I’ll share a version of it.
Korak found dwarves hiding inside the parrot idol. He said, “Why you’re not gods at all. You’re just little bitty men. What do you want?”“We want little bitty women.”

The drabble for today, Better to Fight than Flee,” was written by Russ Manning. The dialogue is taken from the final two pages.

BETTER TO FIGHT THAN FLEE

Korak said to Dina, one of the commune’s two leaders wanting to live in harmony with nature. “Is this the paradise you are searching for?”

“No, not this crazy place. It’s the worst civilization. Not even New York is this insane. Take us to a truly primitive place, Korak, where everyone lives in peace and harmony.”

“Does such a place exist, Lady” Won’t something be wrong no matter where you go. Personally, I’d rather choose what to fight for, instead of hoping to find a place with nothing worth fighting for? My idea of paradise isn’t a place without excitement.”

I SEE BY YOUR OUTFIT

April 10: On this day in 1941, the Rex Maxon illustrated and Don Garden scripted Tarzan daily story arc, “The Paladins.” Concluded after a run of 77 episodes. The Paladins wore Spanish Conquistador helmets and armor. It features Zeela the Jungle Girl, who appears in more episodes than Tarzan does. I’ve used April 10th for the day story arc concluded, that was the date that Huck Huckenpohler used, but it could be argued that the story ran for at least two more weeks before the next story arc, “The Jungle Idol,” began. The two blend together throughout April 1941 and exactly where one ended and the other began is a matter of opinion.

Read the entire story at https://www.erbzine.com/mag47/4753.html and make your own decision.

The drabble for today, “I see By Your Outfit,’ and it was inspired by the story arc and a shameless sense of whimsy.

I SEE BY YOUR OUTFIT

Tarzan stared at the man who’d captured Zeela. “ I see that you’re a Spanish Conquistador. You're wearing that stupid armor that looks like a short skirt. Didn’t your tailor have enough material for a decent pair of trousers?”

The Spaniard sneered. “Big words for a man wearing a loincloth.”

Tarzan said, “Release the woman. You have no business in my jungle. You aren’t from here.”

“I’m not. We’re Spanish pirates from the Custom Islands.”

“Never heard of them.”

“It’s traditional. An Old Spanish Custom. Everyone knows about those.”

“What kind of custom?”

“Everyone visiting Spain goes through customs.”

WORKING WITH WEISSMULLER

April 11: On this day in 1931, actor Johnny Sheffield, Tarzan Finds a Son, Tarzan’s New York Adventure, Tarzan Triumphs, Tarzan’s Desert Mystery, Tarzan and the Amazons, Tarzan and the Leopard Woman, Tarzan and the Huntress was born in Pasadena, California. Johnny also played Bomba, the Jungle Boy in several films and did a pilot film for the unsold and unreleased television series, Bantu, the Zebra Boy. The pilot is available on various websites including YouTube because Sheffield sold videotapes to collectors.

Sheffield's wife, Patty, said that he fell from a ladder while pruning a palm tree. His injuries seemed minor, but he died of a heart attack four hours later on October 15, 2010.

Details about the Tarzan films listed in this article may be found on the magnificent website, www.erbzine.com. A number of articles about Mr. Sheffield: https://www.erbzine.com/mag31/3198.html

The drabble for today, “Working with Weissmuller,” is excerpted from his obituary published in the LA Times on October 19, 2010, written by Dennis McLellan. It contains a series of comments attributed to Johnny Sheffield about his time with Johnny Weissmuller.

WORKING WITH WEISSMULLER

"During the interview, we did underwater swimming scenes. Afterwards, he toweled himself off and he said, ‘This kid can swim fine.'

"He was like a father to me. “He was always looking out for me. We worked with a lot of live animals, and a lot of times, when they got tired, the animals would get feisty.

“There was this one big chimp who got pretty mad one day and was about to bite me while we were on the set. But Big John stuck his leg between me and the chimp, and he was the one who was bitten.”

ONLY OFFENSIVE TO THE GUILTY

April 12: On this day in 1924, ERB began writing his longest novel, Marcia of the Doorstep, which would remain unpublished until 1999 when it was finally published by Doanld M. Grant in both trade and limited editions.

One of the themes of the 125,000-word novel was interracial love, a subject that was taboo in the 1920s and even in this enlightened age we live in about 100 years later the novel has never been reprinted in paperback, nor has it been reprinted in any foreign edition. Seems a shame doesn’t it. As an old man said, “I guess things ain’t changed all that much.”

A synopsis, review, and analysis by Henry Hardy Heins is available at: https://www.erbzine.com/mag0/0049.html. Heins says the following in his opening paragraph:

“MARCIA OF THE DOORSTEP comes through as perhaps the best of all the "realistic" novels which Edgar Rice Burroughs penned about modern life in the United States.”

The drabble for today, “Only Offensive to the Guilty,” was written by Edgar Rice Burroughs’s grandson, Danton Burroughs, in his introduction of the Donald M. Grant edition. The drabble is an excerpt from that introduction.

ONLY OFFENSIVE TO THE GUILTY

MARCIA OF THE DOORSTEP is full of Ed's own ideas and ideals, providing with a forum for his political and social beliefs. Like all of his other stories it, too, is full of coincidences and melodrama.

We’re presenting MARCIA OF THE DOORSTEP here just as Ed wrote it in 1924. We’ve maintained some racial references as they are used by villains and further show their negative qualities, or by characters referring to themselves or their kind in a manner common throughout most of this century. I trust that none of you will be offended by our maintaining of this authenticity.

REINCARNATION

April 13: On this day in 1914, The Eternal Lover began a 6-part run in New York The Evening World. The Eternal Lover featured Edgar Rice Burroughs’s first take on reincarnation and memories of previous lives, concepts that he would also explore in “The Moon Maid” trilogy. This novel was also an early version of the “Edgar Rice Burroughs’ Universe. The story has crossovers. Tarzan and Jane appear and the female protagonist is Victoria Custer, the sister of Barney Custer, from “The Mad King.”

All the publishing details are at: https://www.erbzine.com/mag7/0759.html

The drabble for today, “Reincarnation,” was inspired by the newspaper serialization of the novel.

REINCARNATION
Emma Burroughs said, “Ed, the New York Evening World” is publishing “The Eternal Lover.” I thought you sold that story to All-Story Magazine.”

“I did and then I sold it to the Evening World.”

“Is that even legal?”

“It is. It will be serialized in more newspapers and published as a book. It works like reincarnation. Every new edition is the story’s rebirth. Each new printing is a new body. A good story lives forever, reborn and recreated over and over again.”

“Doesn’t have to be all that good. I’ve read “the Last Days of Pompeii” by Edward Bulwer Lytton.

HATS OFF TO HARRY

April 14: On this day in 1945, ERB’s post -WW2 Laugh It Off column in Hawaii Magazine questioned inconsistencies in the presidential succession policy and praised President Truman. The entire column and all the rest of ERB’s Laugh It Off columns may be read at www.erbzine.com. This column is located at: https://www.erbzine.com/mag17/1755.html#april45

The questions about presidential succession were resolved in 1967. The Twenty-fifth Amendment reaffirmed several of the precedents set by previous presidents and vice presidents in response to their own succession crises. Section 1 authorizes the vice president to become the president upon the former's removal from office, resignation, or death.

The 100-word drabble for today, “Hats Off To Harry,” is excerpted from that column written by Edgar Rice Burroughs. In addition to reviewing the two newspapers mentioned below, Ed checked with the World Almanac (no mention) and the Encyclopedia Britannia, which he found to be decidedly unhelpful.

HATS OFF TO HARRY

President Roosevelt’s death posed no question as to his successor. Naturally, it was Vice-President Harry S. Truman; but from there on the succession order appears to be definitely snafu.

Reasonably confident that in the event of President Truman’s death, I shouldn’t be called upon to succeed, my interest might have flickered out had it not been for my consuming curiosity and thirst for knowledge of no use to me or anyone else.

The Honolulu Advertiser and the Star-Bulletin agreed on three of the first ten places, a high percentage perhaps, but of little value to the searcher after useless knowledge.

LET US FORGET

April 15: On this day in 1936, “The Drag-Net,” a film produced and distributed by Burroughs Tarzan Enterprises, was released. The film was directed by Vin Moore and starred Rod La Rocque, Marion Nixon, Donald Kerr, and Betty Compson. The film ran 61 minutes.

Burroughs-Tarzan Enterprises https://www.erbzine.com/mag2/0287.html is best known for the film, “New Adventures of Tarzan” aka ‘Tarzan and the Green Goddess.” The firm also produced Drag-Net,” “Tundra,” “Young Eagles,” and “Three Wise Monks.”

Ultimately, the enterprise was unsuccessful. The collapse of Burroughs-Tarzan Pictures was inevitable. Sometime in 1937 the corporation went out of business, but BTE continued to function. An agreement with Jesse Goldburg established him as special representative for the sale and exploitation of New Adventures. BTE was in serious financial trouble; its debts were unpaid and heavy judgments were lodged against it. In this crisis, Jesse Goldburg through is vigorous worldwide distribution of the BTE Tarzan properties came to Burroughs’ rescue. Goldburg, who had been accorded a fifty percent commission, produced enough return on the films to pay off the large Citizens Bank note which Ed had endorsed.

In "The Drag-Net," a young attorney who is a notorious playboy is fired from his father’s law firm because of his lifestyle. He joins the district attorney and takes on a crusade against a major crime gang.

The entire film is available to watch for free at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NiqJiiFUUbI. I sat through it yesterday.

The 100 word drabble for today, "Let Us Forget," is excerpted from a review of the film posted at: https://noirencyclopedia.wordpress.com/.../drag-net-the.../ . John Grant appears to be credited as the author of the review.

LET US FORGET
This is one of those lumbering comedy-thrillers that filled the bottom of many a program all over the US in the 1930s. Betty Compson, despite her billing, has little more than a bit part—a great pity, because the movie could have done with more of her. La Rocque is adequate, but it’s no surprise he’s been largely forgotten today; similarly, Marion Nixon is appropriately pretty but leaves no lasting impression on the mind.

The Drag-Net was based on a play by Willard Mack, a very popular playwright, producer and performer on and off Broadway in the 1910s and 1920s.